How to Eat Alone at a Restaurant

Finding a Great Seat

Enjoy dining solo at a busy restaurant by grabbing a seat at the bar. If you’re feeling a little anxious about eating by yourself, this is a great way to ease yourself into it. It’s also a smart way to enjoy delicious food at in-demand restaurants without having to wait or make a reservation weeks in advance. Bar seating is also a great option if you think you might want to chat with the bartender or other patrons a little bit. It’s easy to strike up a conversation when you’re dining alone, and you might meet someone interesting! If the restaurant doesn't have bar seating, look in to whether they have counter seating available instead.

Choose a seat at a communal table if you want to chat with others. Communal tables are a great option if you think you might like to strike up a conversation while you eat, which can be especially nice if you’re traveling and want to talk to the locals. You’ll generally find that people at these types of tables are open to talking and enjoy the casual atmosphere of sharing a dining space. If you want to chat, make sure your body language isn’t closed off. Don’t hunch over your phone or avoid making eye contact with others. Sit up, look around, smile, and be friendly to the people around you.

Sit on the patio when the weather is nice to enjoy the fresh air. Being alone on the patio is also a way to feel less conspicuous if you’re a little nervous dining alone. Just think of how many times you’ve passed a cafe and seen a solo diner reading their book and enjoying a lunchtime break! It’s much more common than you think. Eating outdoors is also an excellent opportunity for people-watching.

Ask for a table in a quiet corner of the dining room to stay out-of-sight. There’s a big difference in how you’ll feel seated in the center of a busy dining room versus off to the side or in a corner where you can look in and see everyone else. If the hostess gives you a table that feels too visible, don’t be afraid to ask for a different one! This is a great technique if you feel a little nervous about going out by yourself. If there aren’t people seated all around you, you’ll be less likely to feel like others are staring at you. Remember, you’re a paying guest and have just as much right as anyone else to ask for the table you want.

Stop in before or after the dinner rush for a better chance at getting a table. This is also a great technique if you’re hoping to chat with your server a little more, as they won’t be as busy yet. If you get there early, you can eat and enjoy yourself while still leaving enough time for the restaurant to turn the table and serve another group before the night is over. Some solo diners like to have a table in the main dining area so they can people watch, while others prefer to eat at the bar.

Make a reservation to get a table during the dinner rush. If you’re all about that 7 p.m. dinner time and want a table or booth all to yourself, call ahead and make a reservation. Let the hostess know you’ll be dining alone so they can remove the second place setting beforehand. If you don’t see a reservation option online, call in and ask. You may even get a tip about the best time to arrive if you decide to stop in on a whim in the future.

Enjoying Your Meal

Treat yourself to a fancy cocktail or nice glass of wine. Use this experience as an opportunity to have something special! If you’re not sure of what would go well with your meal, ask your server for a recommendation. Or, if you’re dining at a more casual place, take your time reading the drinks menu and pick something that stands out. As always with alcohol, be careful not to over-imbibe, especially if you have to drive home. Also, skip the alcoholic drinks if you’re pregnant, under 21, or otherwise shouldn’t consume alcohol.

Eat slowly and relish the flavors of your meal. You might want to eat as quickly as possible so you can leave, especially if you’re feeling self-conscious about eating alone. Try to slow down, though, and focus on your food. Chew each bite thoroughly and think about the flavor profiles. Put your utensils down from time to time and look around or enjoy a sip of your drink. As with eating at any restaurant, there’s a reasonable amount of time you can take up before you’re overstaying your welcome. Eat slowly, but don’t linger for several hours. If you feel anxious, remember that you’re more aware of yourself than others are of you. The other diners are focused on their meals or conversations, and your server has a job to do. With practice, your self-consciousness will fade, and you’ll start looking forward to enjoying alone time at your favorite restaurants.

Use your meal as a mindfulness practice. This takes the act of slowing down and savoring your food to the next level. While you eat, ask yourself how your food tastes, looks, smells, feels, and even how it sounds. When your thoughts start to drift, bring your attention back to your food to ground yourself and calm your mind. This can be a cool way to learn more about flavor profiles and cooking techniques. You might discover something new about your taste preferences!

Take a deep breath if you start to feel self-conscious. Eating alone can spark feelings of insecurity and anxiety, especially if you’re not used to it. You might feel like other people are looking at you or judging you, but try to remember that chances are, they’re too busy thinking about themselves. When negative feelings start to rise, pause, take a breath, and focus on your meal. Don’t be too hard on yourself if your first few forays into solo dining feel uncomfortable. It takes time to learn to enjoy your own company, and you’ll only get better with more practice!

Staying Entertained

Enjoy reading a book while you eat if you want to dive into a good story. Reading and a good meal are two of the greatest pleasures in life, or so some believe. If you have a busy life, this solo meal could be a great opportunity to relax and enjoy yourself. Bring along that latest nonfiction read you’ve wanted to dig into or grab something from the suspense genre for a captivating read. If you’re not interested in talking with others, keeping your nose in a book can communicate that you’re not up for small talk. Having a prop, like a book or a journal, can give you something to focus on if you start feeling stressed or anxious. If you'd like, you can bring a magazine or newspaper to flip through instead.

Pair eating and people-watching if you like observing others unnoticed. This works best in busier restaurants where it’s less likely someone will notice you watching them. It’s also a fantastic way to spend an hour if you can get a window-side seat to view people out shopping and walking around outside the restaurant. If you can get over the social taboo, eavesdropping might be entertaining. It’s sometimes better than watching your favorite drama on TV!

Call a friend and chat while you eat if it won’t disturb the other patrons. If you decide to do this, be mindful of the people around you. There’s nothing more annoying than someone speaking loudly on their phone while others are trying to enjoy a nice meal. If you can do it quietly and discreetly, though, this can be a great time to catch up with a friend or loved one while you enjoy your food. Remember that the people around you may be able to hear what you’re talking about, so don’t dish on anything you wouldn’t want others to know.

Share your experience on social media to bolster your confidence. Snap a picture of your food, cultivate a scene that shows off the atmosphere, or take a selfie—posting online may encourage others who want to dine alone to take the plunge and give it a try. Plus, it’s a great way to show others that there’s nothing embarrassing about taking yourself out to dinner. Even if you don’t feel entirely comfortable eating alone yet, sharing your experience could help you gain confidence.

Put your cell phone away while you eat if you need a break from technology. Stepping away from phone calls, texts, emails, and social media might be just the thing you need to unwind from a busy day. Doing away with your phone will help you be more present, enjoy yourself, and appreciate your meal. Bring along a notebook and pen if you think you might like to take notes, make lists, or work on a project while you eat. You may be able to focus better without getting interrupted by notifications on your phone.