Refocusing Your Thoughts
Avoid media and other things that make you think of that celebrity. When you’re constantly seeing your favorite celebrity all over your social media feed or on TV, it can be really hard to force yourself to think about anything else. Gradually begin to put some distance between yourself and your celebrity. For example, take a break from social media for a couple of days or avoid reading the tabloids about celebrity gossip. Another idea is to unfollow that celebrity on social media and get rid of any posters or other objects that may remind you of them. You certainly don’t have to quit cold turkey right from the start, but make an effort to create specific limitations for yourself. For example, limit yourself to only 1 hour of social media use a day.
Find healthy ways to distract yourself from your obsession. If you’re finding yourself constantly thinking about your favorite celebrity, a distraction might be helpful in getting you to focus on something else. Go work out, take a walk, or hang out with friends to get your mind off of your celebrity. Do something you’ll genuinely enjoy to keep yourself distracted. Do activities that require a lot of focus to keep your thoughts occupied. For example, play a sport with friends, get work done for your job, or cook an intricate recipe.
Focus on areas of your life you may have neglected. Obsessing over something or someone can make it really easy to ignore other important parts of your life, such as your work, relationships, or even personal health. Look to these other areas of your life and start investing the time you might’ve put towards your favorite celebrity to improve them. For example, recconect with old friends or reach out to your family if you haven’t spoken to them in a while. If you’ve been neglecting your work or haven’t been putting in as much effort as you once did, sit down and make a schedule for yourself to plan out exactly when you’ll work and what tasks you’ll do. Make sure you’re taking care of yourself by eating right, getting enough sleep, and staying hydrated.
Practice mindfulness and live in the moment. When you start becoming obsessed with a celebrity, it can be easy to slip into fantasies and ignore what’s happening right now in the present. Doing exercises to practice mindfulness can help you stay present and focus on what’s happening around you. One idea is to practice meditation or do some breathing exercises to help clear your mind and focus on the present moment. Make an effort to actively listen to others when they talk to you and be present in the conversation. Rather than just nodding and smiling, respond to their statements and actively ask them questions to learn more about their thoughts or clarify certain points.
Write down the celebrity’s positive and negative traits. No matter how famous or influential they may be, it’s important to remember that celebrities are people just like you. While they may seem perfect in the public eye, every single person has their share of flaws. Sit down and compile a pros and cons list about this particular celebrity to help put them in a more realistic light. This doesn’t necessarily mean you have to go out looking for dirt on them that paints them in a very unflattering way. Rather, think about the little things that make them more human and less like a perfect superhuman. For example, what are some of their personality traits that you personally don’t find attractive? Do they have any habits that you don’t like? How different are their worldviews from your own?
Creating New Habits
Expand your interests. Life becomes unbalanced at times. Pursue the things that interest you, your hobbies, and your ambitions. To distract yourself from your obsession as well as expand your horizons, don’t be afraid to try new things and explore new hobbies. Some things you might try include: Signing up for an online class for a subject that interests you. Getting a part-time job doing something that seems fun, like being a barista or DJing at a club. Trying new creative hobbies like drawing, painting, or writing.
Meet new people by joining groups or volunteering. If the celebrity you like is someone you believe can provide you with companionship and friendship, going out and meeting new people can be helpful in filling the void they may leave behind. Join a volunteer organization for a purpose you support, talk to new people at your work, or join a community sports team to expand your social circle. Another idea is to have your friends introduce you to new people. Next time your friends invite you to a big gathering or party, respond with a definite “Yes.” Avoid comparing other people to your celebrity. Instead, focus on other people’s unique qualities and appreciate them for who they are.
Create goals to keep yourself motivated. One habit that can help keep your obsession at bay is setting goals for yourself that will introduce a new sense of meaning to your life. Setting goals and accomplishing them can make you feel extremely accomplished and happy. And the best part is, you were the one to bring this happiness into your life, not your favorite celebrity. Set goals that are specific, realistic, and actionable. Break your goal down into small, actionable steps that you can easily measure in order to track your progress. For example, if you have the goal of writing a short story, make it a goal to write 1,000 words a day for 3 weeks.
Talk to a therapist to get professional support. Sometimes it can be really hard to change your way of thinking and behaviors all on your own—and that’s okay! If you think you may need more support, talking to a therapist can provide you with a safe space to express your honest thoughts and feelings. Your therapist might also have exercises for you to help get over your obsession.
Understanding Your Obsession
Identify the celebrity’s qualities that appeal to you. The first step to getting over a celebrity obsession is understanding why you may be so drawn to them in the first place. Sit down and write out all of the things you find appealing about this particular celebrity, whether it’s their looks, personality, or any works they’ve created. Then, ask yourself why these particular qualities appeal to you. One thing to remember is that people often obsess over celebrities because they think they’re “perfect.” Is this something that you may believe about your celebrity as well?
Determine how your obsession is impacting your relationships. A healthy obsession allows you to still connect with and pay attention to others. When your obsession is at a healthy level, you’re often still open to change and will be willing to listen to other people’s thoughts on your behavior. However, an unhealthy obsession may cause you to push others away or completely ignore them in favor of paying attention to your favorite celebrity. Ask yourself these questions: Are you isolating yourself instead of participating in events? Are you quick-tempered with family or friends when you hear that your obsession has done something that upsets you? Do you feel depressed or anxious around others and spend time by yourself to reconnect with the object of your obsession? These are common experiences for some people with a celebrity obsession.
Ask yourself what purpose your obsession serves you. Research suggests that celebrity obsessions can often serve two functions: companionship and personal identity. Do you feel lonely and in need of someone who understands you? Or, perhaps you like the way the celebrity handles themselves and you want to be like them. If you can identify why this obsession may have formed, you’ll be able to more easily identify areas in your personal life that you can change to fill the gap where this celebrity might’ve once stood. For example, if you mostly look to this celebrity for companionship, it might be a sign to go out and try to expand your social circle and nurture positive relationships. On the other hand, if you personally identify with this celebrity, make an effort to embody their positive qualities but with your own unique style.
Think about how realistic your thoughts of this celebrity are. Do you imagine yourself hanging out with this person? Do you often make up fantasy scenarios that involve them? It’s certainly not a bad thing to engage in fantasizing every now and then, but it’s important to remember that that’s all they are; fantasies. Ask yourself how likely these fantasies are to come true. For example, imagining seeing your favorite singer in concert is something that could realistically happen. But telling yourself that you’re going to marry your favorite celebrity is likely on the unrealistic side.
Identify the level of your obsession. Taking an honest, objective look at your obsession can help you determine the degree to which you’re obsessed. Knowing which category you might fall under and being aware of your behaviors can make it much easier to introduce changes to your thoughts and actions. Researchers have identified three categories of obsession under a syndrome known as celebrity worship syndrome: Entertainment-social: This occurs when you’re attracted to a celebrity due to their ability to entertain and become a central topic of discussion with others. For example, you might keep up with news about a certain celebrity because you like to talk about them with your friends. Or, you like this celebrity because of the movies or music they produce. Intense-personal: This type of worship occurs when you have intense and compulsive feelings about a certain celebrity. If you have an intense-personal obsession, you might claim that this celebrity is your “soulmate.” Borderline pathological: This is the most severe level of obsession and refers to individuals who display uncontrollable behaviors and fantasies relating to a celebrity. For example, you would fall under this category if you were willing to commit a crime for your favorite celebrity.
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